Until death do us part

When you first got married, you believed this would be a relationship for life. Very few people get married thinking that it is only temporary. We all believe that our marriages of will work and we will live our lives happily ever after together. We don’t realize that “happily ever after” is lived “one day at a time” and marriages require effort to be “happy.” When difficulties surface (and they always do) we become disillusioned and our happiness becomes unhappy. What is God’s design for our marriage? Could Jesus give us some hints on how to make it last a lifetime?

On Matthew 19:1b-6; Mark 10:1c-9, Jesus leaves Galilee. He will never return except for a brief visit after his resurrection. He travels to Perea on the east side of the Jordan River. Large crowds of people follow him and are eager to hear him teach. On this occasion, some Pharisees ask Jesus about his views on marriage and divorce. I think it would be good if we took seriously what He has to say.

God designed marriage – Matthew 19:1b-4; Mark 10:1c

The Pharisees have a very relaxed attitude towards marriage. Some sources say that a Pharisee who had not divorced his wife was not considered a good Pharisee. When they question Jesus in what appears to be an attempt to justify the divorce, Jesus challenges them with the Law of Moses. They try to counter by saying that Moses commanded them to get a divorce. Jesus reminds them that God designed marriage and divorce because they were marrying people who would lead them away from following God, but it was not part of God’s original design and purpose for marriage.

We have become a culture that has embraced the self-righteous view of marriage as a way to ease the pain of our own selfish unwillingness to keep our marriages healthy. Many have come to believe that they have a “right to be happy” and when they and their spouse disagree on some issue, this selfish “right” overshadows their love for each other and tension builds until they change their attitudes toward each other or give up. for ending the marriage. We need to remember that God designed the institution of marriage and our challenge is to work to make it a successful lifelong relationship. We can also observe the difference between a marriage based on God and a marriage based on man. God’s way is always better.

Marriage is a man and a woman – Matthew 19:5; Mark 10:2-7

Jesus makes it very clear that God designed marriage to be the union of one man and one woman. He made male and female, not male and male. When they marry, they leave their family of origin and create a new family unit. In this union, they create children who will one day choose a spouse of the opposite sex and create their own family unit, and so life goes on. This is God’s design from the day of Creation. Anything else is not marriage!

A simple anatomy class will physically establish that men and women are designed for each other. Any other type of sexual “union” will not reproduce. Simple logic will establish that there is no way that any other type of sexual behavior can be reproduced. Therefore, there is no “gene” that can be held responsible for that behavior. Our psychological make-up confirms that we work best when we learn to appreciate our partner’s strengths and differences as tools to help us become better people rather than areas to create conflict and destroy the love we promised each other when we married. Men can understand that men and women can communicate better with other women, but in short, God designed us to complement each other, not to be in an environment free of conflict with each other. We need to learn to use our spouse’s strengths to complement our weaknesses and work to make the marriage work.

It is also noteworthy that the man and woman leave their parents upon marriage and form their own family unit. Married children who live at home or remain in constant contact with and under the control of their parents are vulnerable to parental interference that has contributed to the breakdown of many marriages. When you get married, you leave your parents’ house and establish a new one with your spouse.

Marriage is a covenant for life – Matthew 19:6; Mark 10:8-9

Jesus concludes his introductory remarks by reminding the Pharisees, and anyone else who will listen, that marriage is a covenant for life. Sexual consumption symbolizes that union and anything else is a violation of God’s design. That makes divorce not an option. Sexual intercourse is the most intimate way a man and a woman can share and confirm their love for each other. This is a statement that sexual intimacy is for marriage and anything else is not God’s way. That also makes sexual relations outside of the marriage relationship a sin.

As I have already mentioned, God wants marriage to be for life. We also admit that we prefer marriage to be for life. Virtually no couple gets married with the idea of ​​getting divorced in a few years. We are looking for that life of love with that person. We want to believe that that someone, to whom we are promising a marriage relationship, will be faithful to us, will love us and will be part of our happiness for the rest of our lives. Everyone admires couples who stay married to each other for life.

It is only man’s own selfishness and sinfulness (redundant terms) that we get angry with the person we promised to love and care for better or worse, in sickness and in health, in riches or in poverty until death us. separate. Everyone who goes through a divorce goes through pain and suffering (and more problems than they would have had had they stayed married and worked through them). We feel sad for those we know who are going through divorce. That should speak volumes to the truth that God’s design for marriage is a lifelong covenant.

God bless you and have a great week!