Teaching our children about community service

I am so tired of picking up the same toys in my house day after day. Now I realize my kids are young (5, 3 and 1) but picking up their toys after a day of play isn’t much to expect from them. We often make it a family affair to clean out the toy room (also known as the bomb room). Honestly though, how many times can you pick up the same toys without getting a little bummed out with everything? You know that Febreeze ad where the lady picks up all the toys and then she sprays the carpet? She turns her back on the toy box for a moment and when she turns around, all the toys have jumped out and are lying on the floor. Yes, that’s how I feel.

So, I decided to give the two older boys 15 minutes to clean up their toys without help, figuring that’s plenty of time for them to firmly start, if not finish, cleaning. Let me tell you, for 5 nights in a row no toys were picked up. The sixth night I took out a garbage bag and began to load it. My 5-year-old asked, “Mom, what are you doing?” My response was, “Since you two don’t seem to care about these toys, we’ll give them to someone who does.” Thus we began to teach our children about community service.

I’ve taken more bags of toys to Goodwill and battered women’s shelters than I can get my hands on. I realized 3 things in my battle with my children. 1) They have too much stuff 2) They don’t appreciate what they have because they have too much stuff and 3) They didn’t miss one bit once it was gone.

Our family is now engaged in 2 community fundraisers each year. In November we partnered with Toys for Tots (http://www.ToysforTots.org) and starts a toy drive that lasts 6 weeks. My kids go with me to a local store where they pick out a toy they’d love to have and donate at the checkout. They would love to have it the first day it is in our house and then it would be abandoned. So instead we lovingly give it to someone who will appreciate it. My 5-year-old daughter understands this and enjoys knowing that she is going to give a child a merry Christmas. My 3 year old has a hard time giving the toy away but we explain why and she gives it up. I know that as he gets older he will have a lot more understanding.

In the spring we work with our local food bank to raise food for them. That’s typically a slow time of year for food banks, but they still need to serve the same number of people. So once again we call on the people of our community, the businesses that are affiliated with the website, my children’s preschool, as well as family and friends. Buying an extra $20 worth of food when I go grocery shopping will make a world of difference for the food bank. This is the challenge we send out to others in the community as well.

Getting involved in my community makes me feel good. I want my children to be proud of where they live and serve the community because it serves them every day. The stronger our community, the stronger our children will be. The stronger our children are, the stronger our families will be. Make time as a family to serve your community!

If families knew how many opportunities there are for them to get involved in helping their community, I know they would be more inclined to do so. There are organizations that need volunteers but there are also things that we can do alone. Some community service opportunities won’t be ideal for toddlers and preschoolers, but there are things they can get involved in, too.

ORGANIZED SERVICE:

1. Adopt a grandparent – Many senior care centers have programs for families to come to the center to visit residents. Nothing will put a smile on an older person’s face than seeing a child. You wouldn’t have to do anything but show up for a visit as often as you can. If your child’s grandparents don’t live close by, this would give them a surrogate grandparent.

2. Help at a homeless shelter – There are so many people who need a place to live and food to eat. By allowing our children to participate in serving these people, we can teach them compassion and love. Most children live in a “bubble” not realizing that many people are much less fortunate than they are. Soon they will see that they are hurt and by their service they are lightening someone else’s load and hopefully brightening their day.

3. Exercise for a cause – I have seen a huge increase in our walking, running and swimming community for all kinds of causes. Many of them are related to cancer, but we’ve also had them for hunger, battered women protection, child abuse, and pet safety. Find a cause you believe in, so get some sponsors and then do it. You will feel great to exercise and spend time with family. (If you have small children, take them in the stroller.) You will feel great that your family is making a difference in people’s lives.

4. Military Care Packages – As a family, you can put together a care package and write letters to men and women serving abroad for your country. You can connect with an organization like http://www.operationmilitarypride.org to make and ship your own packages. Either way, involving our children in supporting the troops is very important. This country is free because there are people who leave their families to fight for it. Thank you!!

5. Christmas boxes – There is a wonderful program called Operation Christmas Child (samaritanspurse.org) that collects shoe boxes to send to children in need around the world. Many churches get involved in this effort, but you can also do it with a business or gaming group or even on a personal level. I let my kids pack a box each (with recommended items) and we had a great time. They wanted to know why we were doing this and where the boxes would go. We looked at a map and talked about how much the children in those countries would like the things in the boxes. It was a special moment for me and my 5 and 3 year old children.

OUR FAMILY SERVICE:

1. Clean up the park – When we arrive at the local park we are going to, we put on our latex gloves and take out a small garbage bag. We spend the first 15 minutes we are in the park picking up trash. It’s not much, but we use the park and therefore we should take care of it.

2. Make a phone call – I don’t have the television on much in my house, but if I see a Tele-thon for a cause I believe in, then I will donate $10 in the name of each of my children. Many people get stuck on the amount they feel they should donate to make a difference. You make a difference just by picking up the phone. When my kids get older, I’ll have them make the phone call themselves. They may even want to donate from their own money.

3. Have a lemonade stand – What kid hasn’t asked to have their own lemonade stand? Let your kids make one, but talk about donating some or all of the money to charity. Make up a couple of price tags, but include “all money raised will be donated to charity.” They may find they have a busy lemonade stand J.

4. St. Jude Children’s Hospital – I am very grateful to have been blessed with 3 healthy children. There are so many people who have had to deal with very serious and life-threatening illnesses with their children. I can’t imagine what those families go through. Every once in a while I get a letter in the mail from St. Jude Hospital. With the letter are a bunch of address labels with my name and address on them. The letter asks for a donation (of any amount) for the research the hospital is doing. Again, it’s not about the amount, it’s about the fact that anything you can give helps. As you write the check, let your kids write a letter or color a picture for a patient. Get them involved in the process and who knows, maybe they’ll set up a pen pal you can keep in touch with.

5. Help out at a local animal shelter – Most kids love animals and giving them the chance to be a bunch of them as often as possible is often a dream come true. The animals will be grateful for the love and attention! At a shelter, a child can learn about different animals and how to care for them. So volunteering is also about teaching our children life skills.

It seems like with each passing day our lives get busier and busier. We need to take time to spend quality time with our families. We want to make our community a great place to live and we want to make our family a strong and supportive unit to live in.

I hope my children will always be compassionate, affectionate, generous, and caring. I want them to know that their individual actions make a difference and that they should strive to make a positive difference. I believe my role as a parent is to help them achieve those traits. By teaching them about community service, being role models for them, and providing them with opportunities to participate, I hope they will learn to be (humbly) proud of their contributions, as well as grateful for their family and their “stuff.” I just hope it doesn’t continue to be all over the floor!