Gifts of pain

Pain is something that sometimes creeps up on us. We may have some indication that it is almost upon us, but many times we know not until we are deep within it.

Pain is not something to fear or run from. It is something to embrace and accept the gifts that you may have hidden within you.

Mom passed away when I was 13 years old. I remember that I could barely stand or walk at the funeral. Sitting in the front row and the Minister talked about her (they were good friends), but all I could do was sob thinking that I would never see her again.

My life changed forever from what I had known.

Fast forward many years later. The first time I went to his grave was on the 30th anniversary of his passing. She is not there, she is everywhere. She is with me now. He was right that I have not seen it except in photos, but that does not mean that it is not here.

Complaints can come knocking on your door sometimes for the smallest things.

Perhaps a flower that sprouts from the ground brings a wave of excitement. This could happen if the flower was your favorite flower or maybe if you planted a garden with your loved one.

Let the emotion come to you, let the tears clear up what you need. Think of the wonderful memories you shared, planting, weeding, picking the flowers. Perhaps you smell the wonderful scent of a particular flower at times when it is nowhere to be seen. Smile, enjoy the thought that your loved one is with you, and share this moment, right now.

The gift of pain in this situation is that you remember the time you spent together doing something that you both enjoyed.

Complaints can get noticed when you revisit places you’ve been.

Mom used to take us to different parks and places where we could have picnics and then take little walks. I have revisited these places throughout my adult life and always carry me back to when I was a child. I admire her for bringing us to these places, sometimes as the only adult (usually 4-6 small children).

Many times the emotion is how proud I am of her and that is really a gift. Other times pain is sprayed and tears may arise. And that’s okay.

When pain knocks on the door, you always have a choice whether to open the door or not. You can choose to keep your emotions in the background or embrace them fully. Feel the emotions and see what is on offer.

If you are reading this, chances are you have experienced grief from the loss of a loved one or from a loss of some kind. We all experience it differently but equally. It is an emotion that comes and goes, ebbs and flows. It is like the ocean tide.

Feel the spray fully when you walk in and hug it, and release the excitement when you return to sea, leaving behind those special gifts.

Angel blessings to you.